Saturday, June 8, 2013

Game of Thrones: Honeycakes

Do you . . . do you want to talk about what happened?

I mean, it might feel better to get it all out.


Yes, I know. Walder Frey is a total dick. So is Tywin Lannister. And the Boltons. Screw them. 

But let's look on the bright side. Or, not-as-bloody side. Robb really wasn't into being king anyway, was he? By the end of it, he just looked tired - Tired of losing men and having whole clans leave his army. Tired of arguing with his mother. Tired of people asking him if he turns into a goddamn wolf. Tired of dealing with Edmure's crap. Getting shot with arrows and stabbed was just a way for him to get out of a war he didn't really want to fight any more, right? I guess it would have been better for him if, you know, he was killed in glorious battle instead of being backstabbed. Honestly, though, trusting untrustworthy fellows and getting betrayed like that kinda runs in the Stark family, doesn't it?

Anyways, I can tell this conversation isn't making you feel any better. Could you at least stop crying? Please? Maybe some medieval sweet cakes will make the world a little brighter for you.

These honeycakes are yeast based, and are soaked in all sorts of sweetness. They are fluffy little pillows, filled with so much glucose that you'll forget all about the Red Wedding.

 Oops. Sorry I mentioned it. Please stop crying.


Honeycakes
slightly adapted from Inn at the Crossroads
makes about a dozen

3 1/3 cups flour
3 Tablespoons honey (divided) (plus more for filling/topping - at least a half cup)
1 Tablespoon sugar
3 Tablespoons ground almond
1/4 teaspoon almond extract
1 teaspoon ground anise seed
1 packet yeast
1/2 pint (1 bottle) brown ale or wheat beer
1/2 teaspoon salt

1) Warm up the ale or beer to about 100 degrees and mix in 1 tablespoon of honey. Dump your yeast in and set aside for about five minutes to let the yeast grow and froth. In a large bowl, mix together your sugar, ground almonds, anise seed, salt, and flour. Make a well in the middle and pour in your yeast/ale with the rest of your honey and your almond extract. Mix together with your hands until a dough forms. Leave it covered in a warm place until it doubles (about 30 minutes). Knead it a couple times, then form it into 12 small buns. Cover again and let rise for another 30 minutes. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees and bake for about 15-20 minutes, or until your buns are golden and their internal temperature has reached 160 degrees.

2) With a small knife, cut a hole in the middle and pour in at least 1 tablespoon of honey into each bun. Let it soak and add more if desired. Drizzle with extra honey and queue up "The Rains of Castamere" on your mp3 player before enjoying. 

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